Worst meat-free Christmas dinners

Heston Blumenthal’s Inverted Vegan Nightmare: “turkey” of freeze-dried, bleached and recombined cranberry meal garnished with “cranberry sauce” of cold blood sausage

Porked pickles

(Fruit) Mince rissoles

Fruits de mer vegaquarian “roast chicken” with langoustine “drumsticks”, fish fillet “white meat” and oyster “giblets”

Bread with bread sauce

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