True story: last night I had QUANTUM in Scrabble but couldn’t find anywhere to put it, so I rearranged it (changing the blank from an M to an A) to make AQUANAUT. I wasn’t sure if that was an actual word or a 70s cartoon super-hero, but it was in the dictionary.
Coincidence? I think so!
I really hate doing visions, so even though my name is on the roster I jump sideways into one of my alternate selves a couple of times. I know that this won’t work but I’m doing it anyway to tease Barry, who turned up just now to give me the day’s assignment. Today Barry is a brightly coloured ceramic tiki mug with thick blue vapour pouring over his rim. “Cut it out,” he snaps, and dropkicks the lazy alternate self into me even though my name wasn’t on the roster. I’m not sure whether to get annoyed at myself or at Barry.
The usual rectangle of deep red velvet curtains appears, cutting off the beautiful view of the Rings and Titan. It’s not just the driving and the mess I hate, it’s the paperwork. I’m holding a handful of forms printed on pink and purple stationery which has a border of unicorns and dolphins in glitter ink. Blah. I glance at the first form.
|OFFICE USE ONLY
1 Stated reason given to subject for refusal to disclose Ultimate Truths (tick ONE)
2. Actual reason for refusal to disclose ultimate truths (tick ONE)