Hamlet

Shakespeare: the not especially funny bits

I’ve already made fun of Hamlet elsewhere in these pages, so here’s something else.

In a chamber at Elsinore

Byron! – he would be all forgotten to-day if he had lived to be a florid old gentleman with iron-grey whiskers, writing very long, very able letters to “The Times” about the Repeal of the Corn Laws. –Beerbohm, Zulieka Dobson

After all these years, I still miss Father.
My very bones are cold — another glass?
We old-timers have got to stick together.

The image of him is as clear as ever,
Although my memory’s not what it was.
After all these years, I still miss Father.

To think he died the same year as his brother,
The year I — yes, I know, the year I “lost”.
We old-timers have got to stick together.

Don’t fuss so. I’m your King, not some old duffer.
I have my funny turns; they always pass.
After all these years, I still miss Father.

And you were always there as Lord Protector.
That dream was horrible — I saw her face —
We old-timers have got to stick together.

Her face was blurred like something underwater.
What would I do without you, Fortinbras?
After all these years, I still miss Father.
We old-timers have got to stick together.